

Part of the reason that “JavaScript sucks” is BECAUSE it doesn’t have alternatives. If you want to build a WebApp that manipulates the DOM, JS has the ONLY API to do it.
For me, “JavaScript sucks” not really because of the language itself, but because there’s such a massive disconnect between what it was designed for (small amount of bells and whistles within a web page), and what the ecosystem uses it for (foundation for entire GUI applications).
If you want to build WebApps, learn JavaScript, then do all your development with TypeScript, and be VERY mindful of the third-party dependencies you pull into your project.
And here I thought the fact that it’s spelled “Cucumber” and not “qcmbr” was the giveaway that it’s a joke.