I would just get set up on MxRoute and use whatever selfhosted service you want to interact with it.

(I don’t know what the problem with a water bowl is, but I digress)

(cats are more likely to drink moving water than still water since moving water is less likely to have bad things growing in it)

Corporations should only be allowed to exist as long as they’re doing more good for society than the damage they do. Businesses should either be a net positive or run by people who are individually and jointly liable.