

Get a burner. Browse some boring content with it: few business websites, maybe some sports scores, maybe snap some photos of landscapes and dogs on the camera roll.
Then you have a functional phone and piece of mind. Making the phone feel “lived in” probably isn’t all that important, but I think it’d be easier to explain than a factory stock pay as you go phone.
I feel like one is a set of boobs. The other is a man, fully erect as seen from the front at a direct angle (business end pointed towards your mouth as you approach the door).
Places with gendered bathrooms should stick to icons that make sense. The place can do something cutesy too, but have a real bathroom sign.