Y’all will laugh at people trying anal with household objects and yet not do anything to even meaningfully oppose queerphobia and male homophobia specifically
It happens to me almost weekly
Anything that is inserted into the rectum has to be eased through the rectal sphincter. Now, there are ways to make the insertion easier such as using lubrication or taking poppers but there’s still gonna sufficient resistance that it’s not gonna happen without the person making it happen.
Are you saying the anus has ways of shutting it all down?
I don’t know what that means.
What I’m saying is that there’s insufficient force and direction for a shampoo bottle to penetrate just from falling onto it.
What if my asshole is already very loose from bouncing on my boys dick for hours?
Asking for a friend?
lol…. It doesn’t happen and if it did it wouldn’t get lodged in there. Tell the nurse the truth when they’re working to remove it, they already know.
No, make the story even more ridiculous. Tell them how you mistook lube for body wash at the store, and while cleaning your ass in the shower your finger accidentally slid inside, surprising you and causing you to slip on the lube, kicking the shampoo bottle into the center of the shower. And in desperately acting to remove your fingers, your stretched your butt cheeks right as you came down on the bottle
Yes, they know what happened. But the least you can do is give them an absurd story, really play it up. Bonus points for giving them all relevant information as another unlikely accident leading up to the event
They’ll eat it up, they’ve seen enough of this to not really care. But a great story will give them joy for years to come
It happens practically everyday but there is a preventative available.
Apparently simply owning a butt plug with a flared base imparts an incredible amount of balance while you’re in the shower.
Researchers are still uncertain why mere possession of a butt plug is so effective but they urge everyone of any gender to purchase one today.
I worked in a bar and a maternity ward nurse that frequented had some stories (as they got called in for helping with ‘extraction’) there were fun stories with billiard balls and less fun stories with young children.
One memorable story is where she managed to identify the plus side to a clergymans cassocks: You can wear one with the shampoo bottle they ‘fell upon’ still inserted.
As an excuse, I’m going with common.
As a reality, I’d be surprised if it happened without significant damage to the body that landed on the bottle.
There is an EMT on tiktok and YouTube that has the running gag about things in butts.
He has a story of a young guy that got the cap of a shampoo bottle lost inside him after accidentally unscrewing it from the bottle.
Common enough that they should really make them with flared bases.
And non-removable caps…
More often than one would think. Apparently someone fell on their .38 revolver and it went all the way up :(
Best $12 I spent in awhile. Great coffeetable book, lmao. It’s a real conversation-starter. https://m.media-amazon.com/images/I/713sBBhxtPL._AC_UF1000,1000_QL80_.jpg
How the heck did a revolver go up there? Those are huge
Challenge accepted!
I have like three lodged behind my toilet right now. I’ll get 'em when I need 'em.
